Ending our summer

Well, I think our summer is finally over - officially. Last week we had a couple of days during the week to play and enjoy a flexible and relaxing schedule. We took our time during breakfast, played at home, and enjoyed each other's company. One of the ways that we did that was playing in Colin's room and making a "parade" out of both children's stuffed animals. I found it hilarious that they both put themselves in the parade. Guess who was at the very front leading it all...Colin, of course. We even brought Cammy (who is basically blind now) upstairs to have some human contact. I don't think she was very happy about it, though.

The two days Colin and Audrey went to school this week were pretty good. I had a terrible time leaving Audrey at the nursery. I really wasn't prepared for that. Last year, she was just a baby and just accepted going. She loves Evelyn and the children there. But, the first day she was fine and then Colin and I had to leave. She was across the room and when I looked over at her she just gave me a look. It seemed to say, what is going on? Why are you both leaving me? So, I did what I shouldn't have done and couldn't help but do. I went over and decided to tell her good-bye. She had been wisked away before by her darling Evelyn, but I wanted to get in a habit of kissing her good-bye so she could expect that. I should have just let it go. When I went over, she clung to me and didn't want me to put her down. She didn't fuss or cry. She didn't even look hurt at me, just surprised. It killed me inside. That isn't the worst part. I missed her all day (and Colin, too, but I got to have lunch with him and he is in the same building with me now). When we went to pick Audrey up, she didn't grab on to me like I wanted her to deep down. Instead, she seemed in a daze. She had only slept have of her regular nap time and I think she was just mentally exhausted - it takes a lot out of anyone to adjust to a different environment and schedule. She wasn't herself for a couple of hours. And then, I just stopped everything and sat down with both of them and we just read books for a while. I think this is what I will do from now on. Come home and just play with them for at least half an hour. Forget dinner, homework, the house, even Clayton (when he is home) unless he wants to play with us. I don't think that will be to hard to do. After reading, Audrey seemed to snap out of whatever fog she was in and came back to herself. She wanted me to hold her most of the evening and wanted me as much as I wanted her. Colin was much more mellow, but I had expected that. He had some time through the summer to adjust to his new environment and his memory can stretch farther than a day or two. The rest of the week went better. I LOVE Audrey's teachers. Her newest teacher has a masters degree in Early Childhood and introduced herself to Audrey before me (I liked that right away). Her other teacher is a friend of mine from The Soulard School. Eleanor has a son, Emmett, three days younger than Audrey. I think they will be great friends! I know it will get easier for me, but I envy those of you who get to stay home with your children. It is one thing to CHOOSE to go to work, but when you know you HAVE to and don't have the option when you would love to, it really hurts your heart often. I keep telling myself that I'm doing this for them and I'll get to be with them often when they go to school, but those early years are so precious...

I will post more photos of these first days at school soon. Until then, enjoy a few from last week and today at Lafayett Park.